Alone with everybody

The thing about yoga is that you don't get to do it alone. Even though I spend so much time on my own. There is a difference between being on your own and being lonely. Let's face it, yoga is a solitary endeavour, we do it in our own little mat, sometimes we break up into partners, mainly we're in our own body and mind. I practice mostly on my own, I plan my classes on my own, when I teach it's me up there at the front on my own. The whole purpose it to go inside yourself and know you better.

So how come I never feel lonely? I never feel lonely because this is a very ancient practice, millions have walked it before me and millions will walk it afterwards. When I chant, I chant words which have been spoken through the ages and will continue to be sung because of the power in their resonance. When I'm lucky enough to be in a crowd in a class there is an energy which lifts everyone. When I read a text, the words have been read and spoken so, so many times.

I am connected through this practice. We are all connected.  

Embrace your inner Goddess

I've been contemplating the cycle of the three goddesses of late: Kali, Saraswati and Lakshmi. It somehow helps is I place myself at any one time within their realm and understand "oh, that's where I am now, huh, so this is what I need to do".

If you're not familiar with the three goddesses, here's the lowdown:

Kali is your mother when she's really mad and fighting your corner. That's right, you wouldn't want to get on the wrong side of her.

Saraswati is the one Bridget Jones always wanted to be. Organised and structured, she's in charge of music and literature.

Lakshmi is bountiful beauty, when I want to bring something into my life I look to Lakshmi, she's the
nectar. She is abundance.

What I love about these three girls is that they are all within me at any one time. We move through
the cycle because none of them work alone. We have to have fierce, raw power to destroy that
which we no longer need. Then things become a little clearer and we start to organise and plan.
After that, we get to enjoy the fruits of our labour. It helps me a lot to accept things when it all goes
a bit pear shaped, the motivation and tools to rebuild and remain humble when my dreams come
true.

A small confession

I have a little confession to make... I've fallen off the practice bandwagon -*shock*. I know it happens; I’m not flaying myself with a birch branch about it and I know our practice ebbs and flows, that’s just how it is. However, I have noticed how it’s affected my life in some very specific and clear ways:
 

Goodbye energy:  I can’t focus, I’m down, my get up and go has got up and gone

Goodbye awareness: Conscious eating is out of the window, think before I speak? – not so much, getting gnarly about the small stuff is on the rise
 

Goodbye fun: there’s a heaviness to everything, a desire to sit under my mat not on it, I haven’t phoned a friend in a while

Interesting isn’t it. The thing about yoga practice is that when you start it’s like a hit that lights you up for days afterwards. Then after you get accustomed to feeling happy and bright most of the time it’s a huge imposition to not get that feeling. Then you get a bit complacent about it and think, it’s cool, I’ll get back to that in time. Then all of a sudden your mats in a corner gathering dust.

‘nough said. Less blogging more mat time.